The clock on the wall has been stuck at 3 for days and days….mostly because I took the batteries out of the clock. It drives me nuts. The constant tick tock throughout the night. Not even the morphine can drown it out. They say home is where the heart is, and that really is no lie. I can tell it that it is not for sure here at this hospital. Although, I have some lovely nurses and a great care team but I would much rather be home. I never thought at 34 years old that I would be dealing with something so complicated. But on the other hand, I never thought at 34 years old that I would be successful in business and be able to provide a good life for my wife and kids. It’s a lot of work, there is no doubt. But through it all, family is so important and we should always never take even the smallest moments for granted.
About Wire and Honey:
Baltimore. A beautiful, gritty, and unabashedly unique city. We are a city that colors outside the lines. At Wire and Honey, we create hip, urban clothing that represents the heart and soul of our beloved city. We draw inspiration from music, culture, and local flair while endorsing and promoting love, tolerance, and global health awareness.
The love you take is equal to the love you make.
Most of you who know me, know that I’m a decent person. But there is always room for improvement. I’m not always the nicest person I could possibly be, I tend to have a short fuse with things that irritate me. And sometimes my mood is determined by how I feel. I shouldn’t ever blame my attitude on a disease or how I feel, but I am sure most of you have been there before. It’s just hard to stay positive all of the time. I try, but then I get sick and my thought process is just not the same. I wish I could say I could control it all of the time, but I just can’t. I’m not saying I am a mean person, I’m just saying sometimes I can be a jerk and not realize that I am.
Currently, I am taking a drug called Ursodiol. Ursodiol is used to dissolve gallstones in patients who do not need to have their gallbladders removed or in those in whom surgery should be avoided because of other medical problems. However, ursodiol works only in those patients whose gallstones are made of cholesterol and works best when these stones are small and of the “floating” type. It is also used to help prevent gallstones in patients who are on rapid weight-loss programs.
It is believed to help make your bile more fluid so that it flows easier through constricted or narrowed bile ducts. For me, all that I know is every time I have ever tried to stop taking it I get sick with Cholangitis.
We are all in search of hope. I apologize if the name offends you but there’s no other good way to put it. Damn Liver. I’m not writing this to gain any sort of sympathy so let’s just say that right off the bat. My condition isn’t great, but I’m thankful to be alive today and enjoy time with my family no matter how I feel at the moment. It’s hard to always be thankful, but I have to try.
So before I confuse you, let me step back in time to 2002. That’s the year I found out that I had PSC, Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis. I know it’s a long name. Sounds more sophisticated than it really is. Basically, PSC is a disease where your liver hates you and wants to be a total pain in the ass 24/7. No, but really ;). Keep reading. I’ll explain.